Tough week...

It's been a hard week for me. This time of the year pretty much sucks. On Tuesday it was the 13 year anniversary of my mother's death. It's never easy but for some reason this year, it has hit me pretty hard. I've been moopy all week. I am lucky that I have a husband that does his best to make me laugh every day. I remember getting the call to let me know she had past on. It odd because it doesn't seem that long ago but at the same time it seems like forever ago. I remember how hard it was to burry her and then turn around just a few days later and celebrate my birthday. It didn't seem right to try to be happy. Sometimes, it still feels that way. I am just not feeling it this year. Normally I drop hints it's getting close, I am a horrible person that way. This year I don't think I would care if people just forgot. I have told Reed I really don't want anything this year. I just want to go to Scottsdale, walk around the art galleries and use our PF Chang's gift card we were given for dog sitting. He already took me shopping to buy some new clothes at Steve and Barry's & Dillards. That was more than I wanted. I am just not feeling like celebrating this year. I kind of feel the same way about Christmas. For the first year ever I have agreed to just do a family gift for us. I told him we can get an X-Box 360. I know I will play it so it's not like it's selfless. I am hoping I can snap out of it. I don't like being a little black rain cloud. I am just not looking forward to the Holiday's or January 18th. It's just a hard time of the year for me.